Today's Horrorscope (Libra): Sep 23 - Oct 23
Today, the universe will conspire against your little finger. Your lucky item - a full metal glove. Keep your hands in your pockets, and the risk of you losing one of your phalanges will narrow significantly to 1 in 2.
NALUSOAN – Surgeons diagnosed last week the root cause of a complaint filed recently by a resident of a northern city of Cebu province. Momi (real name withheld) was on a holiday vacation when she started complaining about itching and a slight soreness in his, I mean her, backyard. He, I mean she, mentioned that [...]
CEBU CITY – The Association of Mothers Bothered by Uncalled-for Termination (AMBUT), Cebu Branch, has filed a complaint against mother ducks who mercilessly sell their eggs for food and shelter. Abortion in Cebu has risen to an alarming rate of thousands a day, and a big portion of that, approximately 99.69%, is due to the [...]
TALAMBAN -Residents get ready for the onslaught of super rain shower alfredo which threatens to flood the busy district in ankle deep flooding. Tensions escalated when the flood weary barangay heard news of a shipment of badly needed rain boots and unfashionable raincoats were lost and swept away, ironically, in a category 7 taligsik just [...]
TALISAY CITY – A man high on marijuana realizes that “all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively”.*
