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Loading ...CEBU CITY — Ariel Rivero, age 38, Filipino, single, Roman Catholic, was found dead in his room at his apartment somewhere in Juan Seno, Mabolo.
Investigators ruled out foul play and came up with the conclusion that it was suicide when they found a suicide note near his pillow drenched with blood that said, “gtg.”
“There is not a trace of foul play anywhere,” said Inspector Marvin Agustino, age 46, Filipino, married, a Jehovah’s Witness. “He killed himself by simply blowing his brains out with his .38 caliber pistol.”
Last night the landlady (name withheld) told me that she heard a noise that sounded like a gunshot in Rivero’s room but she ignored it because she was busy harvesting crops at her Farm Town (a stupendous game in Facebook). The landlady texted Rivero’s family about his untimely death and his family replied, “HU U?”
When interviewed about what they’re going to do with Rivero’s corpse:
“We’re probably going to file charges against him,” the Inspector told us. “Possibly murder and illegal possession of firearms.”
—CDL
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when asked about Ariel’s untimely death, followers of his ‘bagong buwan’ sect, which splintered from the original ‘takip silim’ cult were distraught upon hearing the news of the cult-leader’s murder-suicide, “now who will read passages from twilight for us?” wails J.R. “jun jun” jr 32 (real name and age).
members of bagong buwan must now deal with the process of finding a new leader, occult pundits feel strongly about contenders from the lorega district, and certain copycat serial killers are favored for the new position. -LM